Kaptain Krayola - pie 2.0

Courtesy of good old e_d

Status: Connecting …
Status: Looking for a guide …
Status: Connected to guide: Therese(23236)
Therese(23236): Welcome to ChaCha!
Therese(23236): Hello
You: Hi
Therese(23236): How are you today
Therese(23236): Please be more specific as to what you’re looking for on this topic.
You: I’m okay.. let me ask you.. is your refrigerator running?
Therese(23236): yes
You: well then you better go catch it
Therese(23236): lol
You: where can i buy pink thongs?
Therese(23236): Thanks for being patient! Rest assured I’m finding the most relevant results for your search.
You: Do you have any mens pink thongs?
Therese(23236): let me look
You: thanks…
You: now i need a picture
Therese(23236): ok let me see what i can find
You: theres a guy i know named earl grey… and a picture exists of him wearing a pink thong… can you find it?
Therese(23236): looking
Therese(23236): Thank you have a great day
Therese(23236): Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.
Status: Session ended.

Keep em coming…

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Thanks to UnitedCrown for these pieces of ChaCha Goodness…

His first attempt

Christina(75892): What may I help you search?
You: Chacha : )
Christina(75892): On viagra?
You: I’m looking for how long viagra lasts
Christina(75892): sure, I’ll search that now.
You: Yeah, cause I took 2 the other day and it lasted like 4 hours, my neighbors mom was going crazy
You: i HEARD ONLY 2 HOURS
You: is good
Christina(75892): please check result #1.
You: yep, it says 4 hours Smiley
You: Can you find the minimum age you should take it too.
Christina(75892): sure
You: I’m only 15, but I’m with an older women so I thought I should take it. You know.
You: Do you have any personality? I thought this service would be personal.
Christina(75892): I’m sorry, Cha cha does not allow guides to chat.
Christina(75892): please check result #2

Could have gone a little better. Try number 2 is pretty good though…

Status: Connected to guide: Aimee(68010)
Aimee(68010): Welcome to ChaCha!
Aimee(68010): Hello
Aimee(68010): How can I help you with your search today?
You: Yeah..Chacha!!!!!!!
Aimee(68010): Hi There
You: How long has chacha been here.
Aimee(68010): Well we have been here since Oct of 2006
You: cool
Aimee(68010): I am glad you found us:)
You: Do you do Adult searches?
Aimee(68010): Not at this time
You: me too Smiley
You: o ok sorry
You: thanks anyway
Aimee(68010): but that may be an added feature in the near futer
Aimee(68010): Is there anything else on this topic I can find for you today?
You: what about adult searches for affiliate programs?
Aimee(68010): well what do you want to search and I will let you know:)
You: I wanna find a good program for a wide variety of nitches like latina, anal, blondes, blacks on blondes, asian, milf
You: that kind of stuff. with good revenue share
Aimee(68010): Ahhh yes the normal Porn. . .well one moment and I will get the messege for you from Cha Cha about that:)
Aimee(68010): I am sorry- we here at Cha Cha are not permitted to search for anything Pornographic, Illegal, or anything that falls under The Patriot Act ! ! !
Aimee(68010): But like I said
Aimee(68010): in the near futer it may be an added feature
Aimee(68010): Like a subscribed Cha Cha service:)
Aimee(68010): Our software program isn’t set up for that right now though
You: What about adult forums, that talk about strippers, and escorts? It technically isn’t porn.
Aimee(68010): I sure can find you some adult forums
Aimee(68010): Would you like thet?
You: Please Smiley Aimee
Aimee(68010): ~ Sure, I would be happy to help search that for you, One moment while I gather some results for you
You: Can you find me an escort too? local to San Francisco, nothing trashy though………..I have a dinner event
Aimee(68010): Let me try
Aimee(68010): Ok now let me see if I can find the escort for you
You: Thank you, I don’t get out that much so that’d be great.
Aimee(68010): Thats ok, I understand
You: preferably a petite asian or latina with a c or d cup….
You: but its not like im that picky

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The Kaptain’s good buddy Perkiset from over at The Cache is our first “Guest ChaCha Destroyer”, here goes!

Tarsha(11247): Welcome to ChaCha!
Tarsha(11247): Hello.
You: WOW It works! Are you like, for reals or a ‘bot?
Tarsha(11247): I am for real.LOL
Tarsha(11247): Please be more specific as to what you’re looking for on this topic.
You: Well, I figure you’re there to specifically assist me in finding *good* stuff, so I wondered how easy it was for you also to find crummy, build for adsense only sites in my efforts to cleanse the world of internet spam.
Tarsha(11247): I see.Smiley
Tarsha(11247): Let me send you a link and tell me if this is what you had in mind.
You: Goodie
You: Well that’s an interesting diatribe on the subject, but I’m specifically looking for the sites themselves… you know, stuff like viagra, mesothelioma and such.
You: And can you tell me why they’re #1 and such?
Tarsha(11247): I see. Let me see what I can find for you.
Tarsha(11247): Thanks for being patient! Rest assured I’m finding the most relevant results for your search.
You: Hm, OK.
You: Are you still there?
Tarsha(11247): Yes
Tarsha(11247): Searching.Smiley
You: Fair enough.
Tarsha(11247): Not if the second link is a adsense site.
You: That’s actually a *valid* viagra site. I appreciate your input. Say - I get out in 3-5 if I behave well… do you like bad boys?
Tarsha(11247): Is there anything else on this topic I can find for you today?
You: That last one is pretty good. What are you wearing?
Tarsha(11247): Sorry, it is against Cha-cha policy to chat.
Tarsha(11247): Thank you for using Cha-Cha for your searching needs. Have a fantastic day!!
Tarsha(11247): Please RATE ME. Thanks for using ChaCha.

Quote from Perkiset when we asked how it went “I don’t think she was amused…”

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The Kaptain happened upon ChaCha.com today and was intrigued by the fact that they would give the Kaptain his very own guide! Upon finding this out we promptly opened up a chat with the guide to spread some Fuck You Friday cheer. They apparently don’t appreciate the Kaptain’s sense of humor over at ChaCha.com

Status: Connecting …
Status: Looking for a guide …
Ring: …
Status: Connected to guide: Lori(17387)
Lori(17387): Welcome to ChaCha!
Lori(17387): Hi!
You: CHACHA!
Lori(17387): lol..yep
Lori(17387): chacha
You: do you do a little dance when you say it?
Lori(17387): how can I help you with movies
You: because it makes me feel like dancing
Lori(17387): yes it does!!!
Lori(17387): are you looking for movie reviews
You: im compiling a list of videos where people get pies in the face
You: but having little luck
Lori(17387): lol…sounds fun
Lori(17387): let me see what I can find for you
You: thanks
You: have you ever been pied?
Lori(17387): no thank goodness
Lori(17387): lol
You: you should really try it
Lori(17387): here is a list from u tube
Lori(17387): tons of pie in the face videos
You: CHACHA!
You: the sound of success
Lori(17387): chacha!!!!
Lori(17387): lol
Lori(17387): I like you
Lori(17387): your fun
You: thanks
You: its friday
Lori(17387): have a great chacha day
You: actually its a very special friday
Lori(17387): and a better weekend!!!
You: CAHCHA!
You: FUCK YOU! (it’s friday)!
Lori(17387): !!!! WARNING !!!! abusive language by infoSeeker (FUCK YOU! (it’s friday)!)

For some reason they booted us out of the chat after that. Oh well, better luck next time.

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